Entomophobia

Definition: The crippling fear of insects.

So I don't exactly have a CRIPPLING fear of insects and I had geared myself up for encounters with some weird and wonderful creatures, but there have been a few times that, since coming here, have truly left me hyperventilating.

So, let me tell you about some of them!

The first experience was probably the one that scared me the most. It was the 6th of November, the Tuesday after I had gotten here. I was doing pretty well insect-wise, killing like 6 mosquitoes a day and a couple cockroaches. The wet season has begun early over here, which chases many a 6 legged beast inside. So, it was evening and I was getting ready for bed after a pretty hectic day. I opened my suitcase and was casually humming to myself when I looked up and saw, sitting in the lining of my suitcase flap, this HUGE, black, cockroach-spider thing. It was about the size of the big cockroaches, but it had a much more segmented body. It also had yellow striped legs. Help me out if you have any idea what it is. Anyways, it was just sitting there, unmoving so I summoned my courage, grabbed my slipper and smacked it. It moved slightly but was definitely not dead. So I hit it again. This time it reacted, in a way I would never have guessed. It leapt, yes LEAPT, out of my bag, like 10 inches into the air, and landed on my bedroom floor. And yes, I screamed. Loud. The adrenaline got to me and I just smacked it with my shoe with all I had in me. Green goo all over the floor. Still rather freaked, trying to calm myself down with a repetition of "OK. OK. Its OK.", heart racing, I got some toilet paper and scooped it up. Needless to say, I was searching my room for a good 30 minutes after that, and walking around the house spending time with other humans and still trying to decrease my heart rate. Going to sleep was a challenge. What with the sticking my feet under a cover that could possibly be hiding a bazillion more of these beasties. Even though I was checking with a flashlight every 5 minutes. So yes. That was freaky.

Number the second. This one happened on the 10th, a Saturday. I had had a really great day out with Louis and Winnie, visiting village churches (more on that later) and it had been raining again. I got to my room and saw something dark on my mosquito net, which was draped over my bed. It was sort of in the corner so I couldn’t see where it was/where it was located. I had to sloowwllly twist my net around so I wouldn’t disturb it, in case it flew at my FACE. I finally managed to get it to a side that was visible and I inspected it, realizing it was actually INSIDE the net. Ugh. One good thing, it was now easier to kill. I got two flip flop and smashed them together over where it was. It didn’t work. It just crawled up a bit higher. I tried again and finally managed to squish it. But now it was stuck to my net by its own entrails and if I wanted to get it out without it falling on my bed, I would have to catch it as it fell. Oh! Description. It was like a very large black cockroach with wings. So I opened the net, tissue paper on hand, to try and grab it without getting too messy. That didn’t work. It fell. Onto my bed. I screamed. Again. So I quickly scooped it up and flushed it. There was a nice smear on my net and some scales and legs left so I cleaned that up as best I could and got ready for bed. I was sitting writing down the day's events when I noticed something on my sheets. It was a leg. And it was all spiky and slightly see through and… Mmm.

The next morning (this is number three) I was woken up by one of the ladies in the house (Chaka) as I was going to church with her. As we were chatting I noticed something crawling along my wall. A centipede. She left and I grabbed my bug spray. I sprayed it (a little too enthusiastically) and it curled up and died, literally. So I had to dispose of it some how. Centipedes are the worst things to crush. Because they are all exoskeleton so they make this remarkable CRRUNCH which is so, so sickening. And yes, I used my hands. Flushed that and headed back to the room. Only to find Mr Centi #2 hanging onto my curtain. I had a bit of an “Oh, come ON!” session, then grabbed the spray and dealt with that too. In a flash of genius, I used a water bottle to crush this one. It didn’t really make it any better. CRRUUNCH.

So, there you go. A nice little account of the more major incidents I’ve had to deal with that pertain to insects. Fun stuff.